Loving yourself

       "Life is too short to waste any amount of time on wondering what other people think about you. In the first place, if they had better things going on in their lives, they wouldn't have the time to sit around and talk about you. What's important to me is not others' opinions of me, but what's important to me is my opinion of myself."- C. joybell. 

      Learning how to love yourself is VERY difficult. It took me over 4 years to accept myself for who I am. I have days now when I'm not confident or I feel like I am not good enough. However, I look in the mirror and snap right out of it. I continue to tell myself that I am good enough or pretty enough. You have to get into that habit to tell yourself that. Its not going to be easy I KNOW but always remember nothing in life that's worth it is easy. DON'T FORGET YOU ARE WORTH IT.
   Talking about how I learn to love myself is a VERY LONG list. Therefore, I'm going to break it up into parts. One of the ways I learned to love myself is eliminating people that always talking negative about my weight. You ever heard the saying if you want to change your ways you must change your circle first. Wellll......its soo true. Being around people who always talking down about you is not going to help you. Unfortunately you are going to believe them and beat yourself up.more for not looking a certain way.
Personally, I am an emotional eater (which isnt good). In otherwise If I feel bad about myself I'm going to eat which is going to make me gain more weight which means I'm going to more depress. Thats not helping me at all. Eliminating people that you care about isn't easy but is necessary. Be selfish with who you give the pleasure of seeing your presences.  You are a DIAMOND.
                           Something Personal
I was always bullied about my weight when I was younger. I was ALWAYS the tallest person in class which made my self-esteem lower.  I didn't care about how I look. I use to look in the mirror and get disgusted with myself. I HATED myself, I never understand why I wasn't pretty enough. When I was 18 one of my family member told me that they would pay for a gastric bypass.  He explained that he wanted to see his baby look good when I graduated from school. I was lost of words. After we got off the phone all I could do was cry. I was confused. I questioned myself, was I really THAT fat? Did I need to get a gastric bypass? I thought it was for people over 500 pounds. Life or death situation.  I use all the pain to push me harder to make a better person for myself.  Its not easy but its worth it. 💜
                                       
                                 Fashion
Me and my friend went to New York because she audition for full figure fashion week. Of course she gave the judges LIFE so well see if they pick her to be a model for the fashion show. I'll give yall a update when we hear back. Since we were in New York we HAD to take pictures. My top is from Pennington  (which is old) my boyfriend jeans are from fashion to figure. Jacket (thift) boots from Ashley stewart (which is old).